9:30 club blues

For club venue concerts, crowding is inevitable. But does that mean personal space is ignored entirely? It was Sunday night and the girl behind me really wanted to ruin the excitement of my second-row spot. She decided not to stop a reasonable distance away but instead press against me like a leech. The rest of the crowd filled in and suddenly she became a squished human panini. The opening act was a silent game of tug-of-war with my new back accessory. But as she never danced during the show, I wondered if she existed only to make others miserable. 

Slippery Sock

You’ve just gotten ready for the day and in order to complete your super cute outfit, it is absolutely necessary to wear your new Vans. Before slipping your feet into the shoes you put on the recommended “Vans” socks. You then leave the house feeling great and ready for the day until… it begins to slide. The plastic hold on the back of your socks gives way until your sock is halfway under your foot and your heel rubs directly on your shoe. Before you know it, the moment arrives where a hot spot begins to form and you tug on your sock to keep it on your heel. But it doesn’t make a difference and the dreaded blister is formed. Thanks, slippery sock! •

Potty Sprint

“Five minutes! You have five minutes, let’s go, let’s go!” It begins; the race to the bathroom. Pushing past crowds of students, you rush to get in line. As you near the bathroom, gasping for breath, you realize you’re too late. The line stretches all the way down the hall. You clutch your side in an attempt to catch your breath, with Mr. Bargeman’s countdown ringing in your ears. Right as you open the stall door, you hear: “five… four… three… ” Sprinting back to class, you make it inside just in time for the bell. Raising your hand in defeat, you ask if you may use the bathroom. But your teacher replies, “You should’ve gone before class!”